ELSA

[chanteuser]

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[showyourself]

[well, once kano is finally taken away after an hour, elsa is ready to have a depression nap while everyone else has their lil moments with the soon-to-be-departed—and she's making her way slowly back to the inn.

surprisingly, she looks rather calm—albeit, decidedly aloof. if it wasn't for the pinch in her brow (or the fact that she spent an hour holding kano's arm), it would be hard to discern that she's even bothered at all.

so they probably bump into each other.]

...Alex.

[chanteuser]

[ probably. i'd say i hope one of them falls over but that's mean and they're sad. ]

Hi Elsa.

[ .... ]

Have you been to see him?

[showyourself]

Not... not yet.

[...]

Have you?

[chanteuser]

No... not yet.

[ haha! match ]

I will though. I just... don’t know if he’ll be all that glad to see anyone.

[showyourself]

I think he'd definitely prefer to be on his own. But I still...

[...]

Well, it's selfish, I suppose. I just want to show him I care.

[chanteuser]

...

Don't worry, I'm pretty selfish too. I want to talk to him, even if he doesn't want to talk to anyone. [ terrible, huh? ]

[showyourself]

I think he's going to hate this. And... not just because he'll die. But because of the way he'll be on full display.

[death is... intimate. or, at least, that's how she feels about it. and here they are, practically putting on a show for it. it felt grossly intrusive—and if that was how she felt, then shuuya must feel similarly.]

[chanteuser]

[ ... ]

There's a lot of parts of him he doesn't want to show to anyone, isn't there. Admittedly I don't... like to push him much. Everyone has things they don't want to share, and I wouldn't want someone prying mine from me either.

[ she sighs. she wouldn't feel comfortable with countless eyes watching her final moments either. ]

This is... sort of our fault too. Enough of us assumed removals would be public executions, and now we're stuck with it.

[ two failures for kano. ]

[showyourself]

I think I do push him. But he... doesn't seem to hate it. Maybe he wants someone to push him, once in a while—to be pushed to share things, on some level.

...Look at us, standing around, talking about him. He'd hate this, too. [sigh.] Won tells me you have a singing voice.

[chanteuser]

He's... complicated. But everyone is, under the surface. Who holds that against a person?

[ she pauses, and then laughs. ] He would.

[


won needs to keep his royal mouth shut--i mean ]

Um. Yes, I sing. It's sort of my job back home.

[showyourself]

You do? That's wonderful.

I'd like to hear it, some time. I'm fond of singing myself.

[chanteuser]

You are?

[ alex 🤝 elsa
excited about SINGING ]

I'd love to hear you sing as well! I've... had some people wander in on me singing which was a bit embarrassing. Especially when you think no one can hear you, and you're not really doing your best.

[showyourself]

Aha, Won caught me singing in the woods. [she beams in mutual embarrassment—but then her face falls] Although I... I'm afraid I've forgotten the song, since then.

[chanteuser]

[ won is a serial singing sneaker and he will pay for his crimes. ]

He snuck up on me in the planetarium. [ bad boy. but then she looks genuinely upset ] Oh no, was it because of this place?

[showyourself]

Ah—yes. It was my Mother’s lullaby.

[...]

It was the first thing I lost. It’s funny how it keeps coming up.

[chanteuser]

...

I'm not even sure I remember what I've lost. I must've lost things but they've been... small? Or, well. I'm not sure if I'd know to remember them anyway.

[showyourself]

Oh, you don't know?

[...]

Isn't anything... missing?

[chanteuser]

If it is, I don't remember it. Or it's something that's slipped under the radar.

[ ... ]

It's... terrifying, honestly.

[showyourself]

[...]

That... does sound awful. Comparably, I seem to be getting off rather lightly. I'm... just... forgetting people, I think?

[chanteuser]

... [ elsa your idea of "lightly" is bad. ]

Forgetting people?

[ ... ] That's what I'm most afraid of. Maybe I've forgotten someone, but so completely I don't even remember they exist.

[showyourself]

[she laughs, a little nervously.] See? At least I'm aware that people are... missing. Isn't that lucky?

[this is what she is saying.]

But... it's fine. I still remember the things that are important to me. I'm still... me.

[chanteuser]

I’m starting to think it might be.

[ shhhheeeeeee hates it! ]

...

[ oh ]

That’s not a bad way of looking at it.

[showyourself]

Yes. As long as... as long as I am myself, and I don't forget that, I'm not afraid. I can be strong for myself, and for everyone else.

I'm... not afraid to die, either. If I need to.

[chanteuser]

[ she looks thoughtful for a moment, and maybe a little... wistful? ]

Just stay true to who you are now? [ she. well, who is alex benedetto, anyway? she doesn't know. but she knows who she is right now, and what the "she" right now thinks and feels. maybe holding onto that is enough.

she looks up a little sharply at that last sentence though. ]

... Don't talk like that. I don't know if we can afford to be ideal now, but... I don't want more people to die. Even the people who are killing, it's not as simple as "bad" or "good", or "deserves to die for this" or "doesn't".

[showyourself]

No. Nothing is ever as simple as "bad" or "good". The only thing we can do is press forward, doing the best we can. And being the best we can.

[she. sighs.]

I won't hold you up any longer, if you're going to see Shuuya. I think I'll try to see him later, after everyone else.